Godzilla Merchandise More Horrifyingly Strange Than the Kaiju King Himself

Ever since Godzilla roared onto screens in 1954, it has been a marketing phenomenon, and the franchise has expanded into every type of merchandise imaginable. Because of this, there are loads of different Godzilla products available, covering the usual staples of posters, soundtracks, comics and action figures.

However, over the years, the franchise has also had lots of weird merchandise. From cheap tie-in items designed for children to highly exclusive limited-run items designed to appeal to the most dedicated fans of the franchise. If it exists, someone has tried to make a Godzilla version of it. Here are some of the most horrifyingly strange products to bear the Godzilla license.

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Godzilla & Mothra Tissue Case

Godzilla Merch

While Godzilla and Mothra are more than happy to dispense destruction and justice, that isn't all they can supply the world with. In fact, thanks to these cute plush cases, they can give you all the tissues you need. While Mothra looks like she is spraying web from her mouth thanks to the tissues, it is disappointing that Godzilla dispenses tissues from his back rather than his mouth. What a missed opportunity.

It is available in Japan via P-Bandai.

Takara Tomy Dream Tomica Godzilla Diecast Car

Godzilla Car

Toy cars have been a toy staple for years. No matter the brand or franchise, a company will try and make a toy car based on it. This car was released in 2014, but its box is designed to resemble the classic Tomica toy cars from the '60s and '70s. This car resembles an armored van with Godzilla's face on the front and his spines running across the roof. While it seems strange on the surface, this car is oddly cute and would stand out among other Godzilla-themed items. This range also included a Mothra-themed van.

Godzilla Crocodile Dentist

Godzilla Crocodile

The snapping crocodile game has been a popular novelty the world over for decades. The game is simple: press down the teeth one by one while trying to avoid the tooth that will cause the jaw to snap down on your fingers. This version of the toy replaces the crocodile with a cute version of Godzilla. As a nice touch, the little body has also been given the Godzilla treatment. This is an adorable, cheap novelty that you can find via many toy importers, making it a cute gift for all Godzilla fans.

Godzilla Vs. Evangelion - Type-3 Kiryu EVA Unit-01 Color Ver. Model Kit

Godzilla Eva

Evangelion , like Godzilla, is a marketing juggernaut, having everything from statues to officially licensed buckets. When Evangelion director Hideaki Anno took the role of director for Shin Godzilla, it was only a matter of time before a crossover happened. This kit creates a Mechagodzilla inspired by 2002's Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla.

However, rather than its usual silver color, this Mechagodzilla has the striking color scheme of Evangelion's Unit-01. The resulting combination works surprisingly well, and the model kit is considered a good first-time kit due to its lack of fiddly parts. This unique kit is available via the Crunchyroll store.

Toho Monster Press Conference

Godzilla Press Conference

This adorable set of figures features Godzilla, Mechagodzilla, King Ghidorah and Hedorah. However, rather than causing chaos and destruction, they're all hosting a press conference to apologize for their various crimes. Each bowing figure comes with a small podium for them to stand behind, complete with placards announcing what they're apologizing for. Except for Hedorah, who is not bowing because, as a product of man's pollution, it believes it has done nothing wrong.

These figures were inexpensive at first, however, they quickly went viral and now the only way to find them is by searching the secondary market.

Godzilla Guitar Awakening Version

Godzilla Guitar

Godzilla has been name-checked many times in music, most famously in the Blue Öyster Cult hit "Godzilla." So, it was only a matter of time before someone made a Godzilla-themed instrument.

ESP rose to the challenge and created this Godzilla guitar. The body is a highly detailed replica of the creature, and it even has built-in lights that make Godzilla's spines illuminate on command, all topped with a high-quality maple neck with 24 frets. Alas, the guitar cost over 50 thousand dollars, and only five were made, making it basically impossible to find one these days.

Godzilla Fountain Pen

Godzilla Pen

At first glance, you likely won't realize that this fountain pen set is Godzilla-themed. However, the wiggly lines along the pen's body are meant to resemble Godzilla's skin and spines. The nib does feature an engraved Godzilla, which is a super cute detail. The set comes with four bottles of Godzilla branded ink. It contains bottles of black and blue ink, but it also comes with red and green ink, just in case you want to make your correspondence festive.

It is available from P-Bandai.

Godzilla Tricycle

Godzilla Bike

Japanese company Bullmark became famous in the '60s and '70s for their vinyl figures of Godzilla and Ultraman characters. However, when their popularity started to fade, the company diversified into different toys. The company experimented with putting many of their characters on clockwork tricycles, leading to this charming little toy. This toy has variants featuring the rarely seen Minilla from 1967's Son of Godzilla and is in high demand among collectors of both Godzilla merchandise and general Bullmark collectors. It's not particularly hard to find, but ones in mint condition come with high price tags.

Burning Godzilla Humidifier

Godzilla Humidifier

Godzilla's atomic breath can level cities and lay waste to kaiju thanks to its sheer destructive power. But now, thanks to the magic of merchandising, it can defeat your dry air. This humidifier is cleverly designed so that the humidifying steam is coming out of Godzilla's mouth.

This is actually the second version of this device. The original was based on the original Godzilla design, while this one is based on Burning Godzilla from 1995's Godzilla vs. Destoroyah. This version has an LED that will make the steam look red, so you can recreate the movie's infinite heat breath!

It can be imported via several different import companies.

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