WARNING: The following contains spoilers for the Adachi to Shimamura light novels by Hitoma Iruma, now available in English via Seven Seas Entertainment.
Adachi to Shimamura is a popular yuri light novel series within the iyashikei genre that’s been adapted into both anime and manga. Written by Hitoma Iruma with illustrations by Non, the story follows high school girls Adachi Sakura and Shimamura Hougetsu as they grow from being close friends to something more. However, instead of being a straightforward romance where one chain of events leads to another, this journey is met with a lot of uncertainty as both girls navigate their own insecurities while maturing into adulthood.
Between the two, Adachi is the more tragic co-protagonist whose adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) have profoundly shaped her into the extremely anxious teenager she is now. While both the anime and manga make it clear that her complicated relationship with her mother is the culprit, the light novels explore the Adachi family dynamic in much more detail.
Adachi’s Family Lacks a Secure Foundation
Most of Adachi’s childhood experiences are narrated by Adachi herself, with her mother sharing her own experiences at least once in the Vol. 2 novel. From the accounts of both, it’s clear their relationship was off to a rocky start, beginning with the fact neither Adachi nor her mother appears to have support from either her father or their extended family. As such, it appears Adachi’s mother is raising her daughter entirely on her own, which presents its own unique challenges and stresses.
Little is known about Adachi’s mother's life, but from what can be pieced together, it’s clear she is serving as both the breadwinner and caretaker of her household. With a mortgage to pay and a daughter to raise, Adachi’s mother appears to be working full time, which easily accounts for why she's out of the house for most hours of the day. It would also explain why she’s only able to provide the bare basic necessities -- and why she appears to have little energy to invest in spending quality time with her daughter.
Bonding with her daughter also proved to be a unique challenge for Adachi’s mother, beginning with the fact Adachi had not developed basic language skills by the time she was five years old -- something easily noted by her kindergarten teacher in the “what if” chapter of Adachi to Shimamura Vol. 5. With Adachi not knowing how to communicate her wants and needs to her mother, the latter had trouble reading her body language and could never tell if she was happy or sad.
At best, Adachi's mother tried taking her out to the park to play with other kids and to the zoo, neither of which yielded desired results. When she tried asking her daughter what she wanted for Christmas or her birthday, again she couldn’t get a reply. After a while she gave up -- not because she’d stopped loving her daughter, but because she didn’t know how to work with her, and the attempts drained her of energy.
Adachi Experienced Significant Developmental Delays
Regardless of her mother's intentions, the lack of parental involvement proved damaging to Adachi's social development. While her communication abilities were not impaired, they were still delayed by a couple of years, which in turn significantly delayed the development of her relationship skills. This consequence is explored in-depth in the "what if" chapter of Vol. 5 and a flashback chapter in Vol. 4.
In the "what if" chapter, a socially isolated five-year-old Adachi wants to play with a five-year-old Shimamura, but doesn't know how to approach her. Part of that is due to extreme social anxiety, as well as not being able to speak. It takes their kindergarten teacher intervening to get Shimamura to invite Adachi to play with her and the other kids, but she quickly learns Adachi wanted Shimamura to herself. Adachi is only able to communicate this by gesturing and manages to utter a few words. When Shimamura rejects her wishes, Adachi breaks down crying.
In the real world, Adachi had learned to talk before entering junior high school, but did not desire to make friends having grown accustomed to her social isolation. The tragedy is that her classmates -- both male and female -- found her attractive, but couldn't approach her due to her standoffish behavior. One particular classmate (implied to be Shimamura's future friend Pancho) tried to befriend Adachi when they were both assigned to library duty, but every attempt to initiate conversation resulted in cold responses from Adachi. Eventually the classmate gave up, lamenting not being able to befriend her.
Shimamura Is Adachi’s First Real Relationship Experience
Adachi had planned to continue her antisocial trajectory in high school, even after she met Shimamura for the first time. However, something about Shimamura clicked with her, particularly after she accompanied her to rescue a cicada the latter had knocked off a window. They started spending more time together, even playing ping-pong in the gym school loft. Adachi's interactions with Shimamura awakened something in her she didn't know she wanted: companionship.
Through most of the Adachi to Shimamura light novel series, Adachi struggles to make sense of her feelings for Shimamura due to her lack of experience with relationships. At first she denies being in love with her, believing herself to be straight, but later accepts her feelings for Shimamura are romantic in nature. She then struggles to figure out how to communicate them to Shimamura without creeping her out, and experiences extreme anxiety when she tries asking Shimamura out on dates during specific holidays like Christmas and Valentine's Day.
Another thing Adachi learns about herself is that she gets jealous of Shimamura's other female friends, including Hino Akira and Nagafuji Taeko, who also happen to be her own friends. Adachi gets especially upset when she catches Shimamura with Tarumi at a summer festival she happens to be working. When she confronts Shimamura about the outing over the phone, she loses control of her emotions and unleashes every insecurity she has on her best friend, which (from the word count) lasts 13 minutes. This naturally overwhelms Shimamura who sighs and says "how tiresome" before hanging up.
Following that emotionally explosive phone call, Adachi realizes for the first time she needs to learn better self-control, though that's easier said than done. Loving another person is a completely new experience for Adachi, who has no concept of healthy boundaries. She only knows what she fears losing and every decision she makes is informed by that fear. Even when she confesses her love to Shimamura in Vol. 6 and starts dating her in Vol. 7, none of her insecurities subside, which means she still has a lot of learning left to do.
